Homecoming hullabaloo


Graphic by Anna Villano.

Deeply rooted in high school culture is a tradition we call Homecoming. The purpose of Homecoming is for students from years past to return to and watch our Homecoming game. But for some reason, we teenagers just love to jump on the party wagon. I like Homecoming. It’s a great way to get to know your date and have fun while doing it. However, some parts of it are super silly.

First of all, not many people know what Homecoming is about. For all they know, it could have been created by the Illuminati or the Aztecs to appease the angry sun god. I think students should know a little more about Homecoming when they participate in it. Though, it’s still just as fun if you don’t have a clue about what it is.

Mums and garters are a little ridiculous. While they may be flashy and awesome, they also cost half a kidney. The good thing about this is that by the time you’re finished your second Homecoming, that kidney will have paid for two garters or mums. Okay but seriously, the money we spend on Homecoming could be put to much better use. Instead of letting vendors leach money from lazy teenagers, maybe we could make them ourselves? If everyone does that, we could donate the money we would’ve spent to charity? Maybe that’s a little radical, but I feel like our money could be spent on better things than over priced mums and garters.

Texas Homecomings call for big mums and garters. To be completely honest, I think it’s cool to have big things. Just like the American people, Texas mums and garters are bigger than the average. But that’s okay. It’s just like the saying goes: everything IS bigger in Texas – including our mums. Being serious now, big garters are fun because they’re a little obnoxious. Whenever I see girls walking down the hallway with a mum, they aren’t walking. They’re actually holding their mums up so they don’t die. They remind me of vikings holding up their bucklers as if to block imaginary arrows.But instead of arrows it’s other students because, you know, you can’t trust anyone right?

I wish we could change the obligation of male students to ask female students to Homecoming. I know this is getting better because many independent ladies are asking out guys, but it seems like guys pop the risky question way more than girls. Why do guys have to be the ones to risk being awkward? Take charge ladies!

In the end, Homecoming gets a little crazy sometimes. But, it’s a fun event that you will probably remember for the rest of your life. Treat your date nicely and remember: be careful you don’t kill yourself tripping on a massive mum or garter.